Who said I'm looking for meaning? I'm not.
It's not as liberating as you might think. A joyless existence is either suffering or nothingness. A life without meaning, either internal or external, is one where nothing is meaningful with no motivation thus one of crippling catatonia til death.
All I can say is just that it doesn't feel good and if you can't feel good about anything, your calculus of your life inevitably leads to the conclusion that existence isn't worth it.
There is only one cure/hack for Nihilism or similar...
Go somewhere where you need to work physically you az off to afford daily food. You will be so exhausted eventually that: 1 you will not have any energy left for thoughts. 2 If you have any energy left, you will give it to angriness which will lead to other circumstances which are none related to find the meaning of life.
Ignorance may lead to happiness and friends :)
I think a lot of people are conflating depression with "bad thoughts". That's just one possible symptom, usually as a result of a combination of both anxiety and depression.
I didn't have anxiety, just depression. I rarely thought. I existed on autopilot. I was physically exhausted on a daily basis as a division 1 athlete in college. Often went days without eating either because I simply forgot to eat or forgot to make time for it between classes and training. Didn't change anything.
I think something people are forgetting is that motivation is either driving you toward something you want or driving you away from things you specifically don't want. A complete lack of motivation means I wasn't motivated to do anything to get something, but also I wasn't motivated to anything to avoid something either. I wasn't motivated to eat to avoid hunger pangs. I wasn't motivated to quit my sport to avoid routine physical exhaustion. Instead, my empty autopilot existence just freely acted on the expectations of those around me as a proxy for motivation.
Interesting reply thanks. I would say though, If I were programmed or a program or whatever you name it... I would realize the under statement:
If One can´t be happy with what One have now, One will never-ever be in any circumstances.
This is not your case certainly but is connected with the autopilot (meaning we don´t get to choose.
Yeah, most folk get the causation backwards. They think having meaning in life will pull you out of depression. It's the other way around. You have to get pulled out of depression to be able to find meaning in your life.