Comment by brudgers

they always feel very cliquey

Dealing with "cliquey" is a soft skill...and "soft skills for developers" is cliquey too.

I am not saying Toastmasters is for you, but learning usually feels uncomfortable and indeed feeling out of your comfort zone is one symptom of learning.

More directly, Toastmasters takes public speaking seriously. That's a feature not a bug. Like any community, it filters out people who don't share that value.