Comment by qwerpy

Since you're getting some responses to this, I'll add to what we started.

It's important to note: I think "judging" parents isn't productive. People don't understand there are an insane amount of variables involved in raising kids, especially day-to-day.

So even though, I agree with you: we have tried since the beginning to raise children who can go to museums, who can read for long hours, etc. On vacations, we always packed a big bag of books, mini-games, etc. This will keep little kids busy for hours.

The BIG part though...

Really, sometimes you simply have to let stuff happen. Part of being a parent is engaging your child when they're frustrated and bored, NOT getting rid of them. It's a HUGE part... walking with them outside to talk through their feelings and your expectations.

Is it a pain in the ass? Absolutely. Is it one of the most valuable things you'll ever do with them? Without question.

It is possible to do without tablets/phones. It means you can’t do 2 hour dinners for the first 5 years. Always have a parent ready to walk outside.

Once the child is 5 they will sit and talk to you for hours, do puzzles, and play games.

I've seen a wide spectrum in that. There are those that only wheel out the mind-numbing Youtube videos as a last resort, but I have seen other parents where the kid basically never has dinner without staring at a screen.

I took my 1 year old camping this weekend without my wife. I plopped him in the car seat and put on a Ms. Rachel video so that he would be quiet/calm while I packed up the campsite.

I felt a little bad resorting to using a video like that to "control" him, but then I carried him on a 3 mile hike where he spent the whole time looking at the trees, before eventually falling asleep.

I'm hoping that as he grows up I can just teach him to have a healthy relationship with things like social media and use it like anything else for entertainment.

Man, if you don't want to deal with the challenges of children, why have kids? I don't lie to myself, I know I couldn't do it and I didn't.

Maybe you just don't get to go out for dinner or ride on planes until they don't need to be hypnotized with a screen? You know it's bad for them but you're putting your comforts and freedoms above theirs and everybody else's.

I can't help but feel like the next generation has been completely fucked.

We haven't had to resort to an iPad yet, but I won't rule it out eventually. Especially on a long trip.

However, everyday errands just shouldn't require extended screen time. Children are naturally curious, making it even more surprising when one is glued to a screen instead of investigating their surroundings.

Yeah I don't judge other parents, this stuff is hard.

We do use downloaded stuff on netflix on flights or rarely long drives if we need to keep them awake. But we use colouring, activity books etc on planes before resorting to Netflix.

To be honest, sometimes I feel that if they are on a device too much they just get frustrated and wound up anyway, so you end up shooting yourself in the foot a bit.

Having said that we do let them watch TV at home. If you're parenting alone, sometimes it's the only option to get stuff done.

Yeah don't take a 2-year-old to a dinner like that. Do it later, when they are old enough to sit through it or get a sitter.

It's only a few years when they are this needy. You'll survive without exotic vacations and fancy restaurants for that time.