Comment by giantg2

I don't fit all your criteria. My schools didn't have a gifted track, but I scored highly on many aptitude tests, took the college in high school classes, etc. I wasn't diagnosed with autism until I was an adult. ACE score is 0 though.

I definitely feel like you when it comes to success. I would be considered moderately successful (grad degree, decent professional job, married, kids, etc) but just sort of average (median household income for our area). It doesn't feel like "I made it" yet. It's been a real struggle to keep my job, or really want to keep it. I can't stand the politics and the unknown standards that I need to hit. It also sucks that they can't give me the reasonable accommodations I asked for such as additional coaching and they even talked about putting me on a PIP this year. With the job market the way it is, I'm finding it hard to switch jobs internally or externally. Of course with my autism, changing jobs is also difficult and risky even in a good market. Also as you mentioned, these internal struggles are consistently unknown to those around me. Even my wife doesn't understand how hard certain things affect me and instead sees me as being very smart and very successful even though the data I see only supports the moderate versions of that. I don't feel appreciated at work or at home and I don't get to do very many things that I enjoy.

I'm not satisfied with my life. I wish I had my diagnosis before getting married and I would have chosen a different path. Although I think I'm also greatful for not having the diagnosis before graduating as I probably would have had a "what's the point of trying" moment at some of the difficult points.